We’re only four months into the year and wow…so much has already happened. This really is not how many of us had planned to spend our time, I am sure we all had lots of plans and so much to look forward to coming up to the summer.
We had booked our first holiday abroad for about 8 years, to return to a hotel we had been to before in Gran Canaria. Due to leave on the 18th May and spend Bradleys 9th birthday out there. But on the positive side of our holiday being cancelled we have been given a 20% increase in the price which will make booking for next year a little easier.
We have also booked to go to Camp Bestival down in Dorset at the end of July (this will be our 10th wedding anniversary), although it hasn’t been announced to whether this will go ahead or not, I guess the latter is more likely.
Right before the lockdown started me and a group of fantastic dads managed to complete the Yorkshire 3 peaks challenge, we raised £4500 for three charities. This has been the highlight of my year so far, and I am so glad we did it when we did and with the guys, we did it with. I don’t think we could have had a better group. We did this walk as a celebration of Henrys 3rd birthday, this made for a very emotional journey for me. I was joined by other dads and uncles that had experienced the loss of a baby or child. We were able to talk to each other openly about our experiences comforted knowing that that person really did want to hear our story. Although it was one of the hardest physical things i’ve completed, I can’t wait to do it all over again.
After our challenge I was able to head down south to meet Beth and the kids and some of our family to celebrate Henrys birthday in our preferred way, sat on the beach writing his name in the sand.
Since we have been in lockdown the boys have been off school, both Beth and I have still been needed to work so it’s made trying to home school the boys a challenge. Over the last few weeks we have managed to adjust our approach, and really think about what we would be happy with the boys achieving.
So, we settled on a piece of maths and English each weekday, plenty of crafting, and lots of playtime. The boys a so full of energy, and it’s a real struggle to try containing it. We make use of our exercise time; we get the boys out on their bikes and scooters and try and burn some of that energy off. We are slowly getting some kind of routine, but we are pretty easy going and try to accept when things don’t always go to plan.
If you have followed us for a while you will know that Henrys death was unexpected and sudden, and possibly avoidable. Investigations carried out by the hospital have raised many issues where opportunities where missed to save our son. We are currently waiting for an inquest to look into the care Beth and Henry received. Over the last month we have gone from having a date for his inquest, it being cancelled, and then finding out there has been no real reason for us to have waited 3 years for his inquest. Which now looks to be in the November of this year. When we had our initial pre inquest meeting it was decided by the coroner that they would have an external expert look at all the notes, as well as obtaining some extra statements.
Since then there has been another pre inquest review and it has now been decided that they already have all the information they require, this being the same information they had at the start – 3 years ago. As for the extra statements, these have been unobtainable due to the staff no longer working for the trust.
We really struggle with the constant ups and downs of dealing with the coroner. Just when we think we are doing ok; we get hit round the back of the head with something else. All we want is for the trust to talk through and explain what happened that day. We have read the reports and we know what went wrong, but to hear an official from the trust stand at the inquest and explain the actions of that day is something else…but until that day comes, we will carry on as we have been.
You may have seen on my Instagram page that I have recently taken on sewing, making scrubs bags and halos for our local hospital and for those that want them. I have also made masks for family and friends. I have decided to start making these masks and selling them on Etsy as I have already had a few friends offer to pay for them, of course I have only asked for donations to Henry’s Hope. All money raised from the sale of the masks will go towards making scrubs bags and halos. If you’d like to purchase a mask, you’ll find a link on my homepage